Men joke
that any sex is good sex — and they're not entirely kidding. They're
biologically designed to be gratified in bed more quickly and easily than we
are. But when pressed, almost every man will admit that sometimes sex is better
than good.
Certain sex moves drive them crazy in the best possible way. Women
who know these moves hold the kind of power over men that inspires great art,
novels and films. And you don't have to be lithe or athletic to perfect them.
In fact, they're ridiculously easy to learn.
The seven
techniques here are guaranteed to thrill him — and make him eager to please you
in return. The couples who've tried them can attest to that.
1. Let him
watch
What it is:
Moving in a way that is specifically intended to excite him
How to do
it: Men are erotic visualists, more intensely aroused by visual stimulation
than women are. Some men say that watching a woman climax is the ultimate form
of arousal for them.
Many women
touch themselves discreetly during intercourse to facilitate orgasm. Few
realize they can use this little move with a theatrical flourish to arouse
their men. Next time you're ready to make love and he isn't particularly
interested, put on a sexy shirt and nothing else (except maybe black thigh-high
stockings and a pair of heels) and assume a provocative position, with your
back against the headboard, legs open and bent at the knees. Place two fingers
in an inverted V straddling your clitoris.
What couples
say:
"This
is one of the sexiest things a woman can do for her man. When she touches
herself and looks into his eyes, she's sharing a part of herself he can't have
any other way. I want my wife to do this for me — I fantasize about it — but so
far she hasn't."
— Brad, 29
"The
idea embarrasses me. I don't want to watch him, so why does he want to watch
me? I'll probably do it someday just to please him, but I'll need a glass of
wine first."
— Kristen,
27, his wife
"She
looks at me while she's doing it. She takes long, slow strokes; and I go from
zero to a 90-degree erection in no time. When her hips start moving faster and
her eyes get heavy, I have to have her now."
— Jeff, 35
"I feel
so powerful when I have that kind of immediate and intense effect on him. The
electricity we generate from eye contact would light a room. If you can't be a
shameless exhibitionist with your husband, then with whom?"
— Lisa, 34,
his wife
2. Stand up
your man
What it is:
A manual wake-up call for him
How to do
it: Men love to be stroked, fondled and handled with authority by expert female
hands — and they love watching a woman take manual erotic control of them. If
he's having trouble getting a firm erection, rub a small amount of oil or
lubricant onto your palms and put one hand firmly around the base of his penis.
Work the other hand from the base up to the head in a circular, twisting motion,
as if you were following a winding staircase up his appendage. Caress the head
with your palm. Then start at the bottom again. This staircase goes only one
way: up.
If he's
sensitive around his perineum (the space between his testicles and anus), adjust
the hand gripping the base of his penis so you're free to massage the perineum
with a finger or your thumb. Or pay attention to his testicles if he likes
that. When he has a full and firm erection, guarantee his stamina by using this
stroke: Open your hand and form a V with your thumb and index finger. Slide his
penis between the V so the flat of your palm caresses the shaft, and move
upward from the base to the head. Again, only move up.
What couples
say:
"The
women I knew before I met my wife held me the way a wimpy guy shakes hands. You
don't want that. You don't want a crusher, either. Tessa has the perfect touch;
I let her take charge. When she starts that little twisting move with her hand,
I spring to life."
— Michael,
37
"If you
really like something, you're probably good at it. And I love knowing I can get
him really aroused simply by using my hands."
— Tessa, 30,
his wife
"The
upward strokes really work. There's probably a psychological component to it:
It's like she's pulling my sexual energy upward too."
— James, 40
"I love
being with James. Younger men can get erections so quickly that a woman doesn't
have the opportunity to apply much manual skill. I'm a visual woman, so I get
aroused doing this too."
— Deborah,
29, his wife
3. Take matters
into your own hands
What it is:
A hand job like he's never had — and couldn't possibly give himself
How to do
it: This is really a two-hand job. Begin by clasping your lubricated hands
together, fingers interlaced, tightly around him (but not so tightly, of
course, that you cut off his circulation). Move your hands up the shaft in one
long twisting motion followed by the same motion as you work your way back
down. Now vary that move by eliminating the twist. When he has a firm erection,
clasp your hands at the top of the shaft. Gently contract and release them
around the shaft at approximately one-second intervals. Keep doing this up and
down the shaft, stopping at the rim where the shaft meets the head.
Alternate
the twisting and the contracting strokes until he is ready for launch. Then
hold him firmly in both hands, gently contracting them in time with his spasms.
Finish him off by running your thumb from the base of the shaft on the
underside up to the head.
What couples
say:
"When
she contracts and releases her hands around me, the sensations echo in my head
like erotic heartbeats. A woman who is really good with her hands is an expert
lover."
— Jake, 33
"Jake
has a higher sex drive than I do. He wants sex every day, sometimes more on
weekends. I like to do this for him, especially on a lazy weekend afternoon,
because it gives us a special connection."
— Angela,
31, his wife
"When
she does this for me, I feel the orgasm building more gradually than when we
have intercourse. It's strong, intense. And I can watch."
— Marco, 32
"I
experience him in a different way when I feel him in my hands from the way I do
during intercourse. Every movement is exaggerated, maybe because I see it
happening."
— Kim, 33,
his wife
4. Perfect
the stand-up kiss
What it is:
A way to arouse him or restore his flagging erection during lovemaking
How to do
it: This can arouse him when he thinks he's not in the mood; it's the most
direct route to a state of heightened readiness. Holding his penis firmly in
one hand, take it in your mouth, moving the head and the top third of the shaft
in and out. When he becomes erect, use a variety of strokes, including these
two:
The twist and swirl: Use one hand to do the
circular twisting motion described in move No. 2 as you swirl your tongue
around the corona (the ridge separating the shaft from the head), paying
particular attention to the frenulum (the small piece of skin where the head
meets the shaft).
The butterfly flick: Lightly flick your
tongue back and forth across the delicate corona.
What couples
say:
"Cathy
used to lick like I was an ice-cream cone. Then one day she did this little
swirling thing with her tongue around the rim, and it gave me a tremendous
erection. That inspired her creativity."
— Dennis, 39
"I love
feeling that I can have him whenever I want simply by using my skills. Last
night I surprised him: He came into the bedroom complaining of being tired and
having a headache. I was naked. He was fully dressed. I unzipped his pants: He
wasn't tired and achy anymore. The sex was great."
— Cathy, 38,
his wife
"The
combination of her hand and her tongue, both twisting and swirling, is intense
and irresistible. I may be tired, but when she puts that special move on me, I
become a man of steel."
— Joe, 34
"Control
is important. I do this move long enough to give him an erection with staying
power, but without taking him into the zone where he'll come too soon. I have
to stop myself, because I really get into playing with him."
— Meg, 31,
his wife
5. Give him
the ultimate delight
What it is:
Oral sex all the way
How to do
it: He'll be eternally grateful for this one. Do the steps in move No. 4 until
he's close to orgasm. Then gradually draw him in, as much of him as you can
comfortably handle, keeping a hand firmly around the rest (use your thumb and
forefinger to form a ring — an okay sign — and place this ring around your
mouth). Move your tongue around the shaft. Pull in your cheeks to create
suction. Open your mouth to release the suction, but keep the tip of your
tongue engaged. With the palm of one hand or your thumb, massage the perineum.
What couples
say:
"I love
the way her mouth feels around me, and I also love watching her. I'm always so
grateful that I'll do anything she wants when it's her turn."
— Mark, 35
"This
is the most intimate, loving thing a woman can do for her man. I really enjoy
making Mark happy in such a special way. It gives me satisfaction too."
— Julie, 35,
his wife
"I love
the way she silently uses her cheeks to create suction. She is so elegant and
beautiful, I can't believe she is willing to do this for me."
— Brian, 39
"I use
that little okay-sign technique. Conquer the gag reflex and you've conquered
your man."
— Elaine,
33, his wife
6. Take the
roundabout path
What it is:
An arousing spin on the female-superior position
How to do
it: Men love the special moves women make in the female-superior position. To
increase his excitement and visual stimulation — and intensify clitoral and
G-spot stimulation for you — move on an oval track rather than straight up and
down. Imagine you're circumscribing an oval with your body, with the downstroke
at one end of the oval, the upstroke at the other. Lean forward slightly as you
push down on him, stimulating your clitoris. Pull up and move backward slightly
on the upstroke, stimulating your G spot. (Can't find your G spot? It's a patch
of skin a third of the way up the front vaginal wall, easily reachable with
your fingers.)
What couples
say:
"When
she's on top and she moves in this oval fashion — wow! I can't get that
sensation when I'm on top, no matter how I vary my thrusting. She's a sex
goddess."
— Kevin, 32
"I
actually discovered my G spot in this position. The orgasms I have on the oval
track feel like they're emanating from two places at once. I come in waves.
That makes him more excited, and his orgasms seem to be stronger too."
— Mandy, 34,
his wife
"Watching
her make that oval circuit is as exciting as feeling it. Sometimes she throws
her arm up in the air like she's riding a mechanical bull."
— Gianlucca,
31
"My
pleasure really turns him on. This is my best move because I can gyrate myself
into a big orgasm."
— Anna, 34,
his wife
7. Adjust
the angle
What it is:
A variation on the rear-entry position that dramatically improves the
experience for both of you
How to do
it: This simple adjustment to the basic rear-entry position accomplishes two
worthy goals: It presents your buttocks in the most flattering way possible and
it increases G-spot stimulation. Never had a G-spot orgasm? You just may have
one now.
Here's how
you do it: Kneel on the edge of the bed and have your man stand behind you. Lie
with your chest flat on the bed and elevate your hips at a steeper angle than
you would normally do in this position. This elongates the vaginal barrel,
making the fit tighter and creating additional stimulation for both of you.
What couples
say:
"I love
looking at my wife's buttocks, and I love the fact that I feel larger when I
enter her this way."
— Leo, 39
"When
my buttocks are elevated that high in the air, the little cellulite-pocked
areas where the buttocks meet the thighs smooth out. I look good. When you look
hot, you feel hot."
— Bree, 32,
his wife
"The
fit is tight; the view is extraordinary. And she really gets into her own
experience. I like watching her from this position."
— Derek, 34
"We
both enjoy the deep penetration we get. And I get a lot of sensation in my
nipples with my breasts pressed against the bed."
— Sherrilyn,
31, his wife
By: Susan
Crain Bakos
Photo
Credit: Google images
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